On valentines day I took a girl on a date that I suspect was homeless
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
Swine flu is the new snow day.
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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