i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
you inspire me to be a worse person
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
Randomize
