garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
Man, jail baloney is awful.
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
Randomize
