God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
I woke up in a cornfield to shouting, a bottle of Jim Beam, and a bunch of mc muffins. If this doesn't scream Illinois, idk what does.
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize