Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
Randomize
