Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
Okay who let me pass out in a recliner cuddling a pitbull and a cardboard cutout of Orlando Bloom
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
Randomize
