The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
Randomize