I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
he convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. he slurred every word. i think i found my prince charming.
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
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