Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
Randomize
