the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
Randomize
