i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
I'm going to get drunk on champagne by myself.
Oh no wait my cat's here. Thank god for a second there I sounded really sad.
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
Randomize
