My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
You'd be proud. Took my birth control today at 12:30 with a Budweiser. Guy across the bar saw and held his bottle up to salute me 😂
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
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