Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
Not much. Some creepy guy on Grindr thinks he knows who I am and where I live. So I sent him to that place with jockstraps and bacon. Hope he has fun.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
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