oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
You know what's awkward? Being with your girlfriend and seeing her ex-boyfriend that she left for you while you've got a Ron Burgundy level awkward boner.
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
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