just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
I keep picking up boring men who literally just want to cuddle. HOW AM I THIS BAD AT GETTING SEX?
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
Randomize
