I molested 6 butterflies tonight
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
Swine flu is the new snow day.
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
Walked in on my roommate covering his dick in blue frosting. Am staying with my folks for the Forth. See you Monday if the brain bleach works.
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
Randomize