I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
He updated Facebook... "Got a new phone today." WHAT ABOUT THE FUCKING KID YOU HAD?!
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