It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
Randomize
