My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
Randomize
