We're like a lot better than the average bears
i think my mom watched the whole time
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
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