Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop"
I just told the bartender to “give me something that will murder me”
Randomize
