she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
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