she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
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