im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Randomize
