And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
you went over to those random dudes and told them you were an ordained minister and would like to bless their food. they laughed and agreed, then you said "now bow your heads in prayer" as soon as they did you grabbed a taco off their tray and bolted out the door.
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
how drunk are you?
Several
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
Randomize
