So, I'm about to rent a movie, order pizza, and use my vibrator.... Am I dating myself?
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
So I just walked into the bathroom, and there was this kid, talking to his mom, while taking a shit. I flushed the toilet next to him and heard him say into the phone, "No, I'm not. I'm in my dorm."
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
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