the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize
