OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
as soon as I walked into work this morning, my boss called me out on my hangover, patted me on the back and said I'm getting time an a half for even showing up. Did I really look that bad this morning?
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
Randomize
