He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize
