Dude i have a 6th sense for when bagel bites are ready.
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
Randomize
