it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
Randomize
