so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
how drunk are you?
Several
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
Fuck twitter. Fuck men. Fuck bras. Fuck flip flops. Fuck makeup. Fuck perfume.
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
Randomize
