I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
I yelled at the cab driver to slow down because my unborn children live here, and pointed to my uterus. I think my message was lost in translation though because he immediately offered me his card...
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
Randomize
