I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
My 12 y/o god son's bandmate just asked me to their school dance. Still he's a better catch than the last one...
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
I don’t know whether to call out sick or call in drunk
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
If he’s halfway attractive, employed and cool with me having boytoys, I’ll marry him
Randomize
