I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
P.S. I can't hear my feet
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
Life is so much better after having sex.
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
I have a pocket in my purse that is just for condoms and cocktail swords. I feel like that speaks volumes about me as a person
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize
