even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
don't judge my taste in strippers
How the hell does my fucking boss know about the goddamned magician I fucked?!?
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
Randomize
