he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize