Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
Welcome to texting with Mike. You're now leaving the sober section and headed to our insanely high bad decision making portion of mike. Enjoy the trip.
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
Randomize
