so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
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