HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Randomize
