I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
Randomize
