so that wasnt chicken after all
She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
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