I feel like I'm in dance class right now
sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
YOU GOT KICKED OUT OF FIVE GUYS LAST NIGHT FOR THROWING PEANUTS AT THE PEOPLE WHO WORK THERE?!
correction: escorted out
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
Goddamn tequila
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
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