seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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