So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
i went to go through my sent box of drunk texts from last night and they were all deleted... i'm going to assume drunk me made the executive decision that sober me would be better off not knowing what they said
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
Randomize
