She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize
