reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
I forgot how hot balto sounded
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
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