I want to have your abortion
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
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