it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
Theres a handprint of sauce on my frig, one streaked across my face, a trail of it to my bedroom and sauce all in my bed and i have no idea what the fuck i ate.
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
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