Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
Randomize
