i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
Randomize
