If I had a sex resume I'd get tons of jobs.
So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
Please call me back as soon as your phone is charged, if you die tonight I don't want the last thing I said to you to be "I just farted a little"
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize
